LeviToast®

I bought a new toaster this week, and it comes with a feature not really… advertised.
It literally catapults the toast a good 5-6cm into the sky. Like really just yeets the bread into the stratosphere. While that may be extremely comical, it poses a legitimate problem. I keep losing my toast. Like straight up, it’s just gone. With the parachute springs this toaster seems to possess, upon popping up, the toast could be virtually anywhere.behind the counter, upside down on the ground, or even under the toaster. Crumbs everywhere. Still, good toast is worth the effort. Buttered with tea, shredded for soup. Toast really is the best thing since sliced bread. I wonder who thought of making bread crispy? What a beautiful concept. I could eat peanut butter toast for breakfast for the rest of my days. And that’s the beauty of bread I think. It’s so universal. People have been making bread for decades, and yet humankind still can’t get enough of it. I mean the literal term for money on the streets is dough. Or at least that’s what they tell me. I haven’t been out in 4 months. You tell me if anyone can stay sane that long.
At least I now have toast to keep me company.